Then youll never earn love, I shook my head at Jack.
Do I have to earn love after twenty years of marriage? Emily asked, eyebrows raised. How amusing!
Youre a clever woman, Jack grunted. Is it really that hard to see what I meant?
When a woman is told shes clever, Emily replied, people usually value the opposite trait!
And once again youve got it all wrong! Your manipulation attempt doesnt count! In this case youre the one at fault, not me! Jack snapped.
Ah, in that particular moment! Emily stretched out. What an interesting situation weve got!
So youre home, exhausted, needing a break, and I, as an understanding wife, should not only stay out of your way but also bring dinner to the sofa?
Emily, youre saying it as if Im a tyrant! Jack pressed his lips together. But, realistically, you understand Im tired, dont you?
I understand youre tired, Emily nodded. But you can still get to the kitchen. Youre not crippled or dying!
So youll only bring me food if Im on my deathbed? Jack retorted. Perhaps youd rather see me become an invalid, orGod forbidsomething worse?
Less talk, more action, Emily said, pointing toward the galley. Its right there.
Come on, Emily! Cant you see Im just worn out?
Jack, stop trying to persuade me! Emily raised her voice. Im knackered from work too, and I dont feel like ferrying trays back and forth.
Youll be asking me for salt, ketchup, sour cream, mayo, extra bread, or any other garnish, wont you? Everythings at arms length in the kitchenjust grab it and youre happy!
Exactly, Jack muttered, thats not how you win my love. He shuffled toward the kitchen with the gait of a dying swan.
Actor! Emily sniffed, settling more comfortably in her armchair.
She waited. She waited a long time, anticipate, and then waited no more.
Emily! What does that mean? Jacks shout echoed from the kitchen.
Emily didnt bother to hop up. Not a muscle twitched.
Emily! Jack burst into the sitting room. Whats that?
The pot is in the fridge, the plates are drying, the microwaves on the counter, Emily said calmly.
Well, thats just ridiculous, Jack spat through his teeth. Thats a dead end!
For the record, Emily smiled sweetly, Im also exhausted from work. The conclusion?
Jack stared at his wife for a minute, cursed, and trudged back to the kitchen.
It could have sparked a fullblown family quarrel with tragic fallout, but the next day a visit was on the calendar.
Emilys mother, Margaret, decided to gather the clan because, Its been ages since weve all been together. The occasion wasnt a usual one, and the gathering had been postponed many times before.
Margaret simply wanted the family together for a chat, no particular reason.
Jack thought it was a chance to whine to his motherinlaw. Let her give her daughter a piece of her mind!
He barely waited for the formalities to finish and the sweets to be served before blurting out, I understand, Margaret, but somethings off with your daughter!
Ill say it plainlythings are heading toward divorce territory! You could have intervened, but life throws all sorts of curveballs!
Oh my God, whats happened? Margaret gasped, clutching her chest.
Yesterday I got home from work, utterly drained. I earn the familys money, and the week was brutally intense! They ran me ragged! I asked Emily to feed the provider, and she just pointed at the fridge without moving an inch!
Margarets eyes widenedsurprise, outrage, despair, horror.
Emily met that stare with calm detachment.
My brother Tom chimed in, he said, but theres something odd between Tom and Emily! Im a Sunday dad, you know. Youve heard of my ex, Annano shame, no conscience! I only see my sister on weekends, maybe once a month! Im on my own, collecting child support for my daughter! Ive no time to clean, so I asked Emily for help. She never refused because she knew where I was and where the chores were! Then she pointed me at the broom, tossed a rag under my feet, and told me not to be a pig!
She fell ill, apparently, their son added, and I politely asked her to iron my shirt!
He was getting ready for a date, and she handed me a tutorial video on ironing! Emily took both complaints without a flicker of nerves.
Meanwhile, Emilys mother was fuming.
Emily, what does that mean? Margaret demanded, her voice shaking. You were such a good girlkind, polite, helpful! Im ashamed of you!
For me, theres nothing to be ashamed of! Emily replied firmly.
—
Sunspots appear, and patience, once a virtue, is often deemed a nuisance. People now speak of it with disdain.
What was the point of tolerating?
Why endure so long?
I would not have put up with it!
Neither would I!
Frustration multiplies when someone shows patience, as if it were a flaw, while burning bridges at the slightest convenience is praised as the proper course. Yet dialoguesolving problems with words rather than wreckageis extolled.
Delicacy had always defined Emily. Shed been raised to see every person as a separate world, and to impose ones standards on anothers soul is at best foolish, at worst disastrous.
To understand someone you must step into their shoes, see through their eyes, think as they might, and only then judge actions.
Following that rule, Emily saw a friend whod stolen her boyfriend. The heartbreak was realfirst love and all that.
She first put herself in the boyfriends place:
He wanted more, and I wasnt ready. Kelsey was both willing and wanting it. If Kirill were ten years older, his hormones would be steadier. His behaviour was, under the circumstances, perfectly logical.
Then she considered the friends view:
She came from a large family, always short of cash, with parents forcing her to watch younger siblings. Kirill, on the other hand, had wealthy parents and was an only child. To her, he was a ticket out of a family nightmare, a chance at a better life.
That was just one episode. Countless others showed she never threw in the towel at the first hurdle; she always tried to grasp what drove people to act as they did.
At work, Emily often sensed when colleagues set her up. She could frequently prove her point and right the wrongs.
She never blamed the offender; she simply uncovered the motive. Every motive, unless its sheer madness, has a legitimate claim to existence and can excuse behaviour.
For Jack, Emily became a treasurea priceless gem. Most of Jacks flaws were forgiven, brushed off as minor irritations. It wasnt perfect, but it worked, unnoticed most days.
Not every man knows how to give compliments or court properly, Emily admitted. So I wont blame him for not sending flowers or opening doors. Ill just pull my own chair at the restaurant if I want a comfortable seat.
She applied the same logic elsewhere.
She understood Jack wasnt a tidy sort; his mother always did the cleaning. He wasnt a cook, for the same reason. He didnt know how to handle the washing machine. In short, he was clueless at home, and Emily realised not all men are handy.
She asked Jack to do things, explained, taught, but most of the time she did it herself.
She also accepted that Jack showed little fatherly instinct toward their son, Denis. Science backs him up: men typically start bonding with a child around two to three years old, when they can interact, play, and teach. A screaming infant in a cot is beyond most mens comfort zone, and they fear it.
That explained why Jack was irritated when little Denis wailed, or when Emily spent more time with the boy than with him. Fear and jealousy, plain and simple.
When the marriage crossed its tenyear milestone, Emily recognised Jacks growing chill.
Its a habit now, and were no longer lads with hormones raging!
She also accepted his need for outings with mates.
Workhome, homework. He too wants a change of scenery, a fresh picture.
She wondered, hypothetically, how shed react if Jack ever had a woman on the side. She didnt answer because Jack never looked that way; that flaw simply didnt exist.
Life, however, wasnt only about Jack.
Denis followed his fathers footsteps. No matter how much Emily taught him to help around the house, he preferred the world of computer battles. Thats where he finally clicked with his dad, and Emily saw that for Denis, his father was a role modelnatural enough.
Emily also had a younger brother, Tom. He was the opposite: loud, impulsive, thrived on conflict, feeding off other peoples energy. As a child, Emily often wept at his antics, later realising it was his jealousy and need to control emotions.
Toms marriage was a brief sprint. His wife, though strongwilled, couldnt make it work; after a few years they split, leaving their little daughter, Lucy, without a full family.
Tom became a Sunday dad, utterly clueless about household choresanother Jack in the family. Before taking Lucy for the weekend, hed ask Emily to tidy his place and cook something decent, because he was happy ordering takeaway.
Lucy saw her father only about once a month; she relied on her mother for most things.
Then there was Mom.
People say a mother is sacrosanct, and theyre right. When a mother asks for help, a child cant refuse. If it becomes extreme, one may decline.
Margaret never overstepped. She could clean and cook herself; she invited Emily mainly for company, not labour. Emily gladly kept her company while they cleaned, cooked, and chatted.
Nothing foreshadowed trouble, yet Emily finally said a firm No! and wondered why.
Im not ashamed of myself, Im just sad about my choices, Emily confessed. I was foolish to keep accommodating everyones faults and behaviour.
The foolishness lay in thinking I could keep taking care of you, doing more, believing youd appreciate me because you loved me, she continued. But I never saw you return the sentiment.
The room fell silent; they were used to Emilys quiet. Suddenly she spoke.
Yes, Im no longer a girl, she went on. Its too late to change everything, but from now on Ill do only what I want.
Ill feed the husband after work if I feel like itcook, set the table, wash the dishes. If I dont, you, Jack, know where the fridge is! Youre old enough to feed yourself! That applies to Denis too; hes seventeen now! He can manage cooking, cleaning, ironing if he wants a crisp shirt.
She turned to her brother.
If I want to see my niece, Ill come over and tidy up. If I dont, youll have to learn the simple tasks yourselfor hire a cleaner. Not me!
And you, dear Mum, can welcome your daughter in a tidy flat and treat herself, not force me to do it for you!
Emily looked at the sour faces of her relatives, knowing they didnt like what they heard. She didnt want to be everyones convenience any longer. She wanted to be convenient for herself.
Im going home, she announced, standing. If you dislike the new rules, I wont summon anyone, and dont expect me to answer your calls.
Jack and Denis returned only for a few belongings. Tom stopped calling. Mom phoned just to accuse Emily of selfishness.
Selfishness isnt only thinking of yourself; its demanding everyone think of you first, then you consider them. Think on that!
Emily might not have intended such a radical life overhaul, but the change unfolded on its own. A new life for a new Emilyhappy, because she finally said No.
