«He only married you out of pity,» her sister said before walking out of the kitchen.
«Kates school called again,» Marina set her cup down so sharply tea sloshed over the rim. «Her teacher says shes stopped paying attention in class. Sits there like a ghost.»
Lena flinched, putting down the knife shed been using to peel potatoes. Her sister stood in the doorway, arms crossed, wearing the same expression Lena had known since childhoodthe one that always preceded something unpleasant.
«Maybe shes just tired? The curriculums demanding these days,» Lena murmured, picking up another potato.
«Tired?» Marina scoffed. «Of what? Edward spoils her rotten, and you tiptoe around her like shes made of glass. And whats the result? Failing marks and warnings in her diary.»
Lena stayed silent. Kate *had* changed after she and Edward married. Withdrawn, quiet. Before, shed been lively, talkative. Teachers praised her, classmates were friends. Now…
«You know what I think?» Marina moved closer, sitting across from her. «Kate *knows*. Children sense falsehoods better than adults.»
«What are you on about?» Lena looked up.
«That this marriage of yours is one big lie.» Her sisters voice was calm, but there was an edge to it. «You think she doesnt see how you and Edward act around each other? Like strangers sharing a house.»
Lena felt her chest tighten. The potato slipped from her fingers, splashing into the water.
«Were civil with each other.»
«Oh, come off it! Ive got eyes. You dont even argue properly, just coexist. Edward comes home, eats dinner, watches telly. You cook, clean, do the laundry. Like flatmates, not husband and wife.»
«Not every couple has to row,» Lena kept her voice steady. «Maybe we’re just peaceful people.»
Marina shook her head.
«Lena, stop lying to yourself. Youve seen how Edward looks at youor rather, how he *doesnt*. When you walk into a room, he doesnt even glance up from his paper.»
It was true. Lena had noticed long ago but refused to dwell on it. Edward barely registered her presencea nod in the morning, a question about dinner at night. Conversations were logistical, never warm.
«Remember how he looked at *Olivia*?» Marina pressed. «When she was still alive?»
Lena stiffened. Her sister rarely mentioned Edwards first wife.
«Dont.»
«I *will*. You saw them together. How he doted on her when she was ill. Couldnt take his eyes off her. Hands shaking whenever the doctor spoke. And now? If you caught flu, he wouldnt even fetch you paracetamol.»
Lena stood, walking to the window. Outside, rain speckled the glass in grey streaks. She remembered the day Edward proposedsix months after Olivias funeral. Theyd been drinking tea in the kitchen, Kate asleep upstairs. After a long silence, hed said:
*»Lena would you marry me? Kate needs a mother. And I I cant manage alone.»*
No words of love. No declarations. Just a practical solution.
«He married you out of pity,» Marina said, then left.
Lena stayed by the window, the words echoing. *Out of pity.* Maybe it was true. Edward had pitied hera woman past thirty, alone, no husband, no children. And shed pitied *him*, a widower with a little girl. The result? A family without love. And Kate, suffering most of all.
She returned to the table, gripping the potato knife. Her hands shook. That night shed accepted, shed told herself love might come later. That being needed was enough.
Two years had passed. Nothing changed. Edward remained courteous, gratefulbut cold. Sometimes she caught him staring at Olivias photo in the parlour. His face softened then, eyes tender in a way they never were for her.
The front door clicked. Kate was home from school. The girl went straight to her room without a word. Once, shed burst in chattering about her day. Now, silence.
Lena followed. Kate sat at her desk, hunched over a textbookbut her gaze was vacant.
«Sweetheart, how was school?»
«Fine,» Kate muttered, not looking up.
«Need help with homework?»
«No. Ill manage.»
Lena perched on the bed. Still, Kate wouldnt meet her eyes.
«Love, whats wrong? You hardly talk to me anymore.»
Finally, Kate lifted her head. Her eyes held a sadness too old for ten years.
«Why should I?» she whispered. «Youll leave soon anyway.»
«Why would I leave?»
«Because Dad doesnt love you.» The words were matter-of-fact. «He only loved Mum. He just puts up with you.»
Lenas throat tightened. So the child *did* understand. Had been carrying this alone, afraid to lose someone else.
«Kate, Im not going anywhere. I promised, didnt I?»
«But youre unhappy. Ive seen you crying at night when you think no one hears.»
Lena had no answer. Lately, the tears came oftennot from anger, but a hollow ache. The certainty she was living someone elses life.
That evening, she waited until after dinner to speak. Edward had the telly on low, Kate already upstairs.
«Edward, we need to talk.»
He muted the programme, frowning. «Something wrong?»
«School called today. Kates struggling.»
«Right. What do you suggest?»
She folded her hands. «Dont you think its not really about school? That she senses somethings off in this family?»
«Not following.»
«That were not a *family*. Were just people sharing a house.»
Edwards brow furrowed.
«Lena, wheres this coming from? Kates fed, clothed, cared for. What more does she need?»
«Parents who *love* each other,» Lena said softly. «Children feel these things.»
He turned to the window.
«What do you want me to say?»
«The truth. Why did you marry me?»
A long pause. The clock ticked. The fridge hummed.
«Because Kate needed a mother,» he said at last. «And I needed someone to run the house. Youre a good cook, tidy. Kate likes you.»
«And love?»
He met her eyes, his own almost apologetic.
«I never promised you love. I said why I needed a wife.»
True. He hadnt. Shed assumed it was shyness, that feelings would come. They hadnt.
«If Olivia had lived» she began.
His face changed. Softened.
«But she didnt.»
«Answer me.»
«If Olivia had lived, Id never have remarried,» he said simply.
There it was. The truth shed feared. Shed always be second. A stand-in.
«Edward, what if I left?»
He blinked.
«Why? This arrangement works.»
«For *you*. Not for me. Not for Kate.»
«Kates fine. Its just a phase.»
«No. Shes clever. She *knows*. And its hurting her.»
He paced the room.
«What do you want, Lena? For me to *force* myself to love you? Thats not how it works.»
«I dont want forced love. I want to be free to find someone wholl love me *properly*.»
He stopped, turned.
«And Kate?»
«She stays with you. But she needs a father who lives in the present, not the past.»
Silence. Then he sank back into his chair.
«Where will you go?»
«Marinas, till I find work and a flat.»
«I wont file for divorce.»
«I will.»
Another pause.
«What do I tell Kate?»
«The truth. That adults make mistakes. That well always be friends, just not together.»
He nodded.
«Alright. Maybe youre right.»
That night, Lena lay awake, terrified of starting overbut more terrified of a lifetime as a placeholder.
In the morning, she found Kate before school.
«Sweetheart, I need to tell you something.»
Kate eyed her warily.
«Im leaving. Not because I dont love you. But because grown-ups sometimes realise theyve made mistakes.»
Kate said nothing.
«Youll stay with Dad. Ill be nearby. You can call or visit whenever.»
«And Dad?» Kate whispered.
«Hell be alright. He needs time too.»
Suddenly, Kate hugged her.
«Lena, will you find a nice man? One who loves you properly?»
«I dont know, darling. But Ill try to be happy.»
«Good. I didnt like it when you cried.»
She packed lightly. Edward saw her to the door.
«Lena,» he said awkwardly. «Thank you. For these two years. Youre a good woman. Youll find better than me.»
«And youll learn to live in the present, not the past,» she replied.
Marina hugged her without questions. «Better late than never.»
That evening, Kate called.
«Lena? Dad took Mums photo down today. Said it was time. And he booked me a therapist. Said I should talk about everything.»
«Thats good, sweetheart.»
«He also said youre really brave. That hes proud to have known you.»
Lena smiledproperly, for the first time in years.
Maybe Marina was right. Edward *had* married her out of pity. But she didnt need pity anymore. She needed love. And now, she had a chance to find it.
