**Female Friendship**
Katie and I have been friends since schoolwell, since Year 8, when she moved to our neighbourhood. I didnt have any close girlfriends back then. Most of the girls flocked around Lucy Mayfield, the school beauty whose father was a university professor. The rest, like me, kept to themselves.
I didnt fawn over Lucy, but I didnt pick fights with her eitherI stayed neutral. While Lucys lot sized up the new girl, checking her family background, I took Katie under my wing. Naturally, I gave her the lowdown on Lucy and her clique.
Why are you on your own? Rebelling or something? Katie asked me once.
No, I just like my own company. It suits me. Up to you, thoughif youd rather hang with them, I wont take it personally.
Katie chose me. We werent bulliedjust ignored. I showed her around school, filled her in on the teachers and classmatesthe whole social landscape. Funny thingLucy, the professors daughter, didnt follow in his footsteps. Last I heard, she worked in a boutique. She pretended not to recognise me when we crossed paths.
Katie was cleverer than meand, to my mind, prettier. At that age, I hated everything about myself. My hair was a wild mess, my chest too big, my legs too short. A proper ugly duckling. Katie, meanwhile, had smooth blonde hair, bright blue eyes, and the kind of figure I envied.
Years later, she admitted shed thought *I* was the pretty onethat shed been jealous of *me* all along.
We grew inseparable. We even planned to go to the same universityuntil her mother pushed her toward an economics degree, while I dreamed of medicine. Not just any doctora surgeon.
We argued, didnt speak for days. Then made up, because life apart was unbearable. In the end, we each went where we wantedbut saw less of each other. Still, when we met, wed talk for hours.
In her second year, Katie fell for a bloke from her course. She wouldnt shut up about him. Me? I was drowning in Latin and anatomyno time for romance.
By third year, shed had an abortionher parents never knew. By fourth year, she was pregnant again. I didnt like the boyfriend, begged her not to marry him. She wouldnt listen. Told her parents, and they made sure she wouldnt be a single mother.
By my sixth year, Id given up on surgeryswitched to gastroenterology. Less pressure. Two years passed without seeing Katiethen we bumped into each other. Shed put on weight, looked almost pregnant. Pushing a pram with a little girl in pink, she caught my glance at her belly and nodded. Due in August. Husband wants a boy.
She was surprised I was still single. Thats when she confessedshed envied me at school, thought *she* was the plain one. Married in a panic, terrified no one else would have her. Silly girl. We promised to stay in touch.
A year after the boy was born, her husband left. Called her fat, a cow, said shed trapped him with kids. She was a wrecksweats, messy ponytail, dull eyes.
You shouldve told me sooner. Id have helped you lose weight, I scolded.
Easy for youstill pretty, still free, she shot back. I let it slide.
Her kids grewNick started school, Lizzie fancied boys. I had flings but never married. No regrets. Katie and I met occasionallylife got in the way.
Then came a medical conference in London.
A man caught my eyestayed in the next hotel room. You know when you just *know*? We even shared a restaurant table. He mentioned a new clinic opening in my city, run by a friendAlex.
Ive heard of it, I said.
Would you recommend I take the job? he asked.
Your choice, I shrugged.
On the last night, there was a concert and drinks. We talked over wine. I checked my watchhad a train to catch. Just as I was about to say goodbye, someone dragged him away. No time to waitI left.
I thought he liked me toobut he didnt ask for my number. Maybe he assumed wed meet at breakfast. Maybe he had a wife. No ring doesnt mean a thing. Men should make the first move.
*Let him wonder when I dont show up tomorrow.* Pity, though. Not meant to be.
Two months later, Katie called, giddy. Come oversomethings happened!
I brought sweets for the kids, wine for us. Shed lost weight, cut her hairglowing.
Youve met someone, I guessed.
Her eyes lit up. Hes *perfect*.
As she described him, I pictured Alex.
Nicks at his grans, Lizzies out with friends, she babbled, pouring wine. Hes new at work
Wait, you left the bank?
Ages ago. Better pay at this new clinic. Anyway, he offered me a lift home, carried my laptop up, I made him tea
And?
Nothing yet. But its only a matter of time.
So nothings actually happened? I hid my relief. Whats his name?
Alex. Alex Olton.
Ice water down my spine. Coincidence? Or fates joke? Katie prattled onhow kind he was, how shed invite him to her birthday
And hes single? Odd, for a man like that.
Youre just jealous, she sniffed. Youll seeIll marry him.
Devastated, I lied: Happy for you, then left.
At her birthday party, I saw him. Alex recognised me instantlyhurried over. Katie watched, tense.
Hed taken the clinic job. Ever thought of joining us? he asked.
Might do, I said.
Katie dragged him off to the kitchen. I slipped out. Not fighting over a man.
Yet he chased me down the street.
Why leave?
You know Katies my best friend? And shes mad about you.
Theres nothing there. I only gave her a liftshes built it up. But Im glad I came tonight. I moved here for you.
He walked me home. Still no number asked for. My phone, left behind, showed ten missed calls.
Katie screamed down the line: Some friend! Stealing him from under my nose!
We rowed like schoolgirls over a crush.
Let me have him, she pleaded. Youre pretty, youll find someone. This might be my last chance.
Kat, if hed wanted you, why chase *me*?
Just stay out of it. Theres nothing between you, is there?
No.
Truth was, I barely knew Alex. And this mess felt wrong.
I told him next time we methed turned up at my clinic with flowers.
Katies my friend. I wont ruin that over you.
A week later, Katie came to menot angry, but resigned. We talked. He likes *you*. She sighed. I wanted revenge at first. Then realisedwhats the point? You cant force love. Dont you dare reject him for my sake.
We cried, made up, drank to our tangled lives.
Alex and I started dating. Two months later, he proposed. Katie came to the weddingwith a date of her own.
I got pregnant straight away. Why wait? Katie soothed my fears over the phone.
We stayed friendsnot rivals, never enemies. Both found happiness. People say female friendship dies at the first man. Ours survived.
