Are you serious again? I asked, slamming my jacket onto the kitchen chair. Natalie, whos she really here for? For herself or for us? I come home from the office, want a proper dinner, a bit of peace, some time with you, and instead Im stuck looking after someone elses kid!
He’s not exactly a stranger, Natalie muttered, shivering a little. Honestly, I dont like it either. But Olivia asked she needs her nails done, and you cant take a baby to the salon.
I unbuttoned my coat, feeling the weight of the day. Feeding my nephew was best done in something comfortable, not a suit that would get splattered with baby purée fifty-fifty odds of a stain.
I get it, I said, but you cant just drop everything for her nails. Are you the only one she leans on? Why does our family feel like a crèche?
Moms still around, Natalie began, reaching for the spaghetti. She cant be on call every day, though.
You, on the other hand, I cut in, can do everything for everyone except yourself and me.
At first I scowled, then I sighed and softened. I knew my wife wasnt my enemy; she was just endlessly obliging.
Natalie, if you dont pull her off your shoulder, shell keep riding you, and youll be the one blamed. The one whos carrying the load is the one who ends up driving the cart.
She pretended to be engrossed in the dinner, but inside she knew I was right. She didnt know what to do. She didnt want to be a second mother to her nephew, nor to clash with the rest of the clan.
It all started innocently enough.
Nat, Im feeling poorly and Sams in my arms. I need to hit the chemist, but I cant leave him alone. I cant make it alone, Olivia begged. Help me, please.
Without a second thought, Natalie sprinted to the front line, not even considering a delivery service. Her sister was ill, possibly seriously, and needed rescuing.
Soon the rescuing became a constant.
Can you pick up my phone from the repair shop? Olivia called. Were out of groceries? Natalie was on it again. Package arrived at the collection point? She was off like a personal courier.
Natalie could afford this because she worked remotely with a flexible schedule, but that didnt make it any easier. A fifteenminute walk to Olivias flat, doubled for the return, plus the time spent queuing and shopping, easily topped an hour.
She shifted her work to evenings and sometimes nights when the house was quiet. My husband wasnt thrilled, and neither was Natalie. She tried to talk to Olivia.
Olivia, whats up with Paul? Doesnt he help at all? Natalie asked gently while handing over another parcel from the delivery service.
He does, but hes exhausted from work. If he can sit with the little one while I dash to the shower, the rest is on me, Olivia replied.
Olivia guarded her own husband, but she never thought about anyone elses. Natalie snorted and fell silent for a moment.
What about his mum? She lives just down the road, doesnt she? Natalie pressed.
Dont even mention her! Olivia rolled her eyes. I dont want anything to do with that nag. She turns everything into a nightmare and fills the whole day with unwanted advice. Better to starve than ask her for anything.
Is there really no one else? Natalie asked. Oksanas kid is about the same age as yours. Maybe you could team up one watches, the other runs errands. Or Christina, who isnt working at all.
It feels wrong to lean on strangers, Olivia admitted. Theyre not obliged.
Leaning on our own is convenient, Natalie sighed.
Thats when she decided to try refusing. Even without my prompting, she sensed it wasnt right.
The opportunity came quickly: the next day Olivia phoned, saying shed booked a slot at the salon.
Natalie, come over and watch Sam for an hour, she demanded. Im only gone for a bit.
Her tone was more a command than a request. It infuriated Natalie; why should she upend her plans just so Olivia could get her nails done?
No, Olivia. I cant today. Sorry.
What do you mean you cant?
I cant solve all your problems. I have a life too.
I get it, but what am I supposed to do? Youre the only one I have. Ive already booked, I cant let anyone down. Shes stubborn, she wont take anyone else.
Olivia, you didnt even ask me before you booked. Im not your errandgirl or a nanny. Sort it out yourself.
Youre easy to tell me that, youve got no children. You dont know how hard it is.
She knew the truth the nephew was gradually becoming her own son. Natalie kept quiet; she avoided conflict, and even this refusal felt like a heroic feat.
Olivia didnt give up. She looped in their mother.
Mum, how could you? Shes my sister, she has a toddler and you turn her down? Shes all we have. Who will help her if not us?
Mum, when she asked me for medicine I went, because it was urgent. But now she calls every other day for little things Today she even wants to go to the salon! Is it really that urgent?
Shes a woman, she wants to look nice. Put yourself in her shoes.
Natalie raised an eyebrow. No one had ever put themselves in her shoes.
Mum, if youre so clever, why dont you just help her?
I? I can barely stand on my own two feet! Youre the young one, its easier for you.
Youre always called the young one, childless, still at home Im fed up with that. That day I finally said no.
In retaliation they gave both mother and Olivia the silent treatment for a whole week, acting as if Natalie didnt exist. Others might have breathed a sigh of relief, but Natalie felt displaced and kept wondering how to mend things.
So when a week later Olivia called again, begging Natalie to watch the child while she got her nails done, Natalie gave in. She loathed herself for it, but she slipped back into the unpaid nanny role. It seemed there were only two choices: be an outcast in her own family or endure.
Youre too soft sometimes, youll end up snapping, my husband warned after hearing the story. Be careful, or shell never let go.
Natalie sighed, nodded, and spent the night pondering how to refuse without creating a new grievance.
At noon the phone rang predictably.
Natalie, I cant the little one has a fever, hes wailing all morning, and Im running around like a hamster! I cant even sit down, let alone use the loo. Come over, well manage together.
I cant. I have work. Were under strict monitoring software now, even lunch breaks are timed, just like an office. Natalie lied.
Silence lingered a few seconds. Olivia seemed to be looking for a weak spot.
Please, just once, the last time! Ask someone to cover you, or take a day off.
Olivia didnt understand the halftruth. Natalie had no choice. She pretended to concede.
Fine Ill figure something out.
She hung up and messaged Paul, asking for his mothers number, saying his wife needed urgent help. Paul didnt refuse, and his mother agreed to pop over. Natalie could even predict when the mother would arrive, as Olivia bombarded her with messages.
Have you lost your mind? Olivia texted. Why did you rope her into this?
Your help was needed, so I asked her, Natalie replied coolly. I cant be there myself, you know that.
Olivia read it and stayed silent. In that moment Natalie felt a small victory. Not a war, but a tiny battle won. Yes, Olivia would sulk, and Mum might be annoyed again, but now the sister would have to manage on her own or learn to rely on those who truly wanted to help.
