Dont expect love if youre not being easy, Stan shook his head.
After twentyplus years of marriage do I still have to earn love? Emily shot back, halfsmiling. Really, thats a question.
Youre a clever woman, arent you? Stan frowned. Is it that hard to see what I meant?
When a womans called clever, Emily replied, people usually mean the opposite!
And youve got it wrong again! No manipulation here, youre the one in the wrong, not me, Stan said.
Exactly, in this particular situation! Isnt it an interesting one? Emily went on. Youre exhausted after work and need to unwind, and I, as a considerate wife, should not only stay out of your way but also bring dinner to the sofa?
Emily, youre making it sound like Im a tyrant! Stan pursed his lips. But as a normal person, you get that Im wiped out, right?
I get that youre tired, Emily nodded. But you can still get to the kitchen youre not a cripple or on your deathbed.
So youll only bring me food if Im on the brink of a disaster? Stan snapped. Maybe you want me to become a cripple, or, God forbid, something worse?
Less talk, more action, Emily said, pointing toward the kitchen. Its right over there.
Come on, Emily! Dont you see? Im a normal bloke, Im knackered!
Stan, quit trying to persuade me! Emily raised her voice. Im wiped out from work too, and I dont feel like dashing back and forth with trays. Youll probably ask for salt, ketchup, sour cream, mayo, extra bread, or whatever else. Everythings in the kitchen just grab it and youre set!
Stan shook his head. Thats not how you earn my love, he muttered, shuffling to the kitchen with the gait of a dying swan.
Actor! Emily snorted, settling more comfortably in her armchair. Shed been waiting, anticipating, and finally, she got it.
Emily! Whats that supposed to mean? Stans shout echoed from the kitchen.
Emily didnt even think about getting up. Not a muscle twitched.
Emily! Stan burst into the living room. Whats that?
The pots in the fridge, the plates are drying, the microwaves still where it belongs, Emily said calmly.
Honestly, thats nonsense! Stan rasped through his teeth. Its ridiculous!
For the record, Emily smiled sweetly, Im exhausted from work too.
Stan stared at his wife for a minute, cursed, and trudged back to the kitchen.
It could have sparked a fullblown family blowup, but the next day a visit was on the calendar. Emilys mum, Mrs. Lawrence, wanted to get the family together because its been ages. The excuse was flimsy, and theyd postponed it a dozen times before.
Mrs. Lawrence just wanted everyone under one roof to chat, no special reason. So Stan decided to gripe to his motherinlaw:
Let her have a word with her own daughter!
He waited for the formal part of the gathering to end, when dessert was about to be served, then blurted out, I get it, Mrs. Lawrence, but somethings off with your daughter!
Whats happened? she gasped, clutching her chest.
Yesterday I got home from a brutal day at the office. Im the one bringing home the money, and the week was a nightmare. I was drained! I asked Emily to feed the man of the house, and she just pointed at the fridge without moving a finger!
Emily held Mrs. Lawrences stunned gaze with a calm, detached look.
Just a headsup, Emilys brother Tom interjected, somethings not right with Emily. Im a Sunday dad, you know I used to look after my exgirlfriend, Anna, who had no shame or conscience!
Zina only sees me on weekends, sometimes once a month. Im on my own, paying child support, so I dont have time to clean. Emily asked for help, and she never said no because she knew where I was and where the mess was!
And then she pointed me at a broom, threw a rag under my feet, and told me not to be a pig!
Shes even gotten sick, Tom added, and I just asked her to iron my shirt! She handed me a tutorial on her tablet and the iron was ready in a flash.
Emily listened to all those complaints without a flicker of irritation.
Her mum, however, got genuinely worked up.
Emily, what does that mean? Mrs. Lawrence exclaimed, exasperated. You were such a good girlkind, polite, helpful! Im ashamed of you!
And Im not ashamed of myself! Emily snapped firmly.
—
Even sunshine has spots. Patience, once a virtue, now feels more like a burden, and people call it out with a negative tone.
Why put up with it?
Why endure for so long?
Id never put up with that!
I wouldnt stand for it!
Frustration multiplies when anyone shows patience, as if its a flaw, while burning bridges whenever its convenient is praised. Still, people love a tidy chat that solves problems with words, not with fists or scorched bridges.
Delicacy was Emilys hallmark. Shed been raised to treat each person as a separate world, never imposing her own standards on someone else. To understand someone you have to walk in their shoes, see through their eyes, think as they think, then only judge.
Following that rule, Emily finally saw why her friend had taken her boyfriend. The first love hurt, but she put herself in the blokes shoes:
He wanted more, I wasnt ready, and Katie was not only ready but wanted it. If Kyle had been ten years older, hed have had his hormones in check. His actions actually made sense.
Then she switched to the friends perspective:
She comes from a big family, moneys always tight, and the parents expect her to look after the younger ones. Kyles parents are rich, hes an only child to her, hes a ticket out of a family nightmare, a chance at a better life.
It was just one of many examples. She never threw in the towel at the first hurdle; she always tried to grasp what drove a persons actions.
At work she could spot being set up, and she often managed to prove she was right and set things straight. She never blamed the offender, just found the cause. Any cause that isnt madness has a legitimate place and can explain the behaviour.
For Stan, Emily became a treasure, a priceless gem. Most of his flaws were forgiven, turned into harmless quirks.
Not every bloke knows how to compliment or flirt, Emily admitted. So I wont toss him for not bringing flowers or opening doors. Ill just pull my own chair in a restaurant if I need to.
She let go of many expectations.
She understood Stan wasnt a household manager his mum always did that. He didnt cook, didnt know how to handle the washing machine, basically nothing around the house. She realised not all men are handy. Shed ask, teach, and often do things herself.
She also accepted that Stan didnt show strong fatherly instincts early on. Science says dads start bonding around age three, when you can actually interact. Theyre clueless about a screaming infant and often scared. Thats why Stan got irritated when little Dennis cried, and why Emily spent more time with the boy than with her husband.
When their marriage hit the tenyear mark, Emily noticed Stan growing colder.
Old habits die hard. Were not lads any more, hormones have settled.
She also got why he hung out with his mates; workhome balance, a need for a change of scene.
She even wondered, hypothetically, if Stan ever cheated, could she understand? The question hung there, but there was no need for an answer Stan never looked that way, and that was a comfort.
Life wasnt just about the husband. Their son Dennis followed his dads footsteps, preferring videogame battles over chores. Still, Emily realised Dennis saw his dad as a role model that was natural.
Emilys brother Tom, younger but opposite in temperament, loved noise, drama, and conflict, feeding off other peoples energy. As a child, Emily had cried over his antics, later seeing they stemmed from jealousy and a need to control emotions. Toms marriage was shortlived; his wife, with a fiery temper, left him, and their little daughter Zina now shuffles between homes.
Tom had become a Sunday dad, never really mastering household chores another Stan in the family. When he asked Emily to tidy his flat before a weekend with Zina, she obliged because ordering takeout wasnt his style. Zinas exwife only dropped her off once a month, so Toms duties were sporadic.
Then there was mum. People say Mum is sacred, and theyre right. When mum asks for help, you cant say no, unless its outright unreasonable. Mrs. Lawrence never overstepped; she could clean and cook herself, but she invited Emily mainly for company. Emily enjoyed the chat while they tidied and cooked together.
All of a sudden, Emily felt a strong, clear No.
Im not ashamed of myself, Im just feeling a bit foolish for trying to please everyone, she confessed. I thought youd notice my effort because you love me, respect me, and value me. I never saw that for years.
The room fell silent; they were used to Emilys quiet. Now she spoke up.
I’m not a teenager anymore, and its too late to overhaul everything. From now on Ill only do what I truly want.
Want to feed the husband after work? Ill cook, set the table, wash the dishes. Not want to? Stan, you know where the fridge is!
Youre not five years old, you can feed yourself! That goes for Dennis too hes seventeen, he can manage a shirt, an iron, a meal if he wants.
Emily turned to Tom.
If I feel like visiting my niece, Ill swing by and tidy up for you. If not, learn to do it yourself or hire help. Dont expect me to do it all!
And you, Mum, can welcome your daughter in a clean flat and offer a snack, instead of making me do everything.
She saw the sour looks around her and realized nobody liked hearing her set new rules. She didnt like being everybodys convenience, so she decided to be convenient for herself.
Im heading home, Emily announced, standing up. If you dont like the new game, I wont call anyone, and you dont have to ring me.
Stan and Dennis came back only for their bags. Tom stopped calling. Mum phoned just to accuse her of selfishness.
Selfishness isnt about thinking only of yourself, Emily replied, its demanding everyone think of you first, then themselves. Think about that.
Emily might not have planned such a drastic change, but life took her there. A new chapter for a new Emily a happy one, all because she finally said No.
