Dont expect love if you wont earn it, Stephen shook his head.
After twentyplus years of marriage, do I still have to earn love? Emily snapped, eyes flaring. Isnt that fascinating?
Smart women are a paradox, arent they? Stephen snarled, his brow knotted. Cant you see what I meant?
When a man calls a woman smart, hes usually complimenting the opposite trait, Emily retorted, her voice a razors edge.
And once again youve twisted everything! Your manipulations wont count! In this argument the fault lies with you, not me! Stephen barked.
Ah, so now were talking specifics, Emily said, the sarcasm thick enough to cut. What a delightful predicament weve found ourselves in!
Youre exhausted after work, you need a break, and I, as a considerate wife, should not only stand aside but also bring dinner to the sofa?
Stephen, youre making it sound as if Im a tyrant! he pressed his lips together, trying to sound reasonable. But surely a sane man can understand Im weary?
I get that youre tired, Emily nodded. But you can still walk to the kitchen. Youre not a cripple, nor on your deathbed!
So youll only serve me food if Im incapacitated? Stephen snapped. Or perhaps you hope Ill become oneGod forbid!
Less chatter, more action, Emily said, pointing toward the kitchen. Its right there.
Come on, Emily! Dont you see? Im exhausted!
Enough with the pleading, Stephen! she raised her voice. Ive had a long day too. I dont want to be shuttling trays back and forth. Youll probably ask for salt, ketchup, mayo, even extra bread, and the pantrys stockedjust grab it and be satisfied!
Yes, Stephen muttered, thats not how you win my love. He shuffled toward the kitchen with the graceless gait of a dying swan.
Actor! Emily huffed, settling more comfortably into the armchair.
She waited. She waited, anticipating, and finally
Emily! Whats that? Stephens shout echoed from the kitchen.
She didnt rise a muscle. Not a twitch.
Emily! Stephen burst into the room. Whats going on?
The pots in the fridge, the plates are drying, the microwaves still there, Emily said calmly.
Honestly, Stephen, thats absurd! he spat through clenched teeth. Its like youve built a wall around me!
For the record, Emily smiled sweetly, Im also drained from work. The point?
Stephen stared at his wife for a long, silent minute, cursed under his breath, and trudged back to the kitchen.
What could have ignited a fullblown family fiasco with tragic overtones instead blossomed into a scheduled visit the next day. Emilys mother, Margaret, had decided to gather the family, citing Its been ages since weve all been together. The excuse was flimsy, the kind rarely used, and had been postponed dozens of times before.
Mrs. LawrenceEmilys motherinlawwanted everyone together simply to chat. Stephen, feeling the sting, thought of complaining to his motherinlaw.
Let her motherinlaw at least give her a talkingto! he muttered.
When the formal part of the gathering ended and dessert was about to be served, Stephen seized his moment.
Mrs. Lawrence, I understand everything, but somethings off with your daughter! he declared. Id say its heading toward divorce. Its all falling apart!
Lord above! Whats happened? Margaret gasped, clutching her chest.
Yesterday I came home from workexhausted beyond words. I bring home the money for this family, and the week was a nightmare! They drained me dry! I asked Emily to feed the provider, and she just pointed at the fridge, unmoving!
Margarets eyes widenedsurprise, outrage, desperation, horror all flashing through them. Emily met that stare with calm, almost detached, composure.
Wouldnt have said it, interjected Emilys brother, Colin, but somethings wrong with Emily and me. Im out on Sunday mornings, you know. You remember my ex, Anna? No shame, no conscience! I only get my daughter Zinnia on weekends, sometimes once a month! Im a single dad, paying child support! No time to clean! I asked Emily for help, and she never refused because she knew where I was and where the chores were! Then she tossed a broom at me, a rag on the floor, and told me not to be a slob!
She fell ill, apparently, said the son, joining Stephen in his complaint. I just asked her to iron my shirt for a date, and she handed me the iron, turned on a tutorial on her tablet, and that was that!
Emily listened to both grievances without a flicker of agitation.
Her mother, Margaret, however, was less amused.
Emily, what does this mean? she demanded, voice trembling. You were such a good girlkind, polite, helpful! Im ashamed of you!
Im not ashamed of myself! Emily replied firmly.
—
Even the sun has its stains. Patience once praised now feels anything but noble, and people criticize it more than they celebrate it.
Why endure? Why put up with it so long? I would never have tolerated it! I wouldnt have tolerated it! The outrage multiplies whenever someone shows patience, as if it were a flaw. Yet burning bridges at any convenient moment is hailed as the right thing to do, while dialoguesolving problems with words, not wreckageis praised.
Delicacy was Emilys nature. Shed been raised to see every person as a separate world, and to impose ones own standards on anothers soul was, at best, foolish, at worst, disastrous. To understand someone you must stand in their shoes, see through their eyes, think as they think, then only judge.
Following that rule, Emily saw the friend who stole her boyfriend. It hurtfirst love and all that. She put herself in the boys place:
He wanted more, I wasnt ready. Ksenia was ready and wanted it. If Kirill were ten years older, hormones would be tamed. His actions, then, were logical.
She then placed herself in the friends shoes:
She came from a large family, always short on cash, parents demanding she watch her younger siblings. Kirill, on the other hand, had wealthy parents and was an only childher ticket out of a cramped household, a chance at a better life.
It was just one of many examples. She never gave up at the first hurdle; she always tried to grasp what drove a persons actions.
At work, when colleagues set her up, she often proved right and restored justice, never blaming the offender, merely finding the cause. Any cause, unless madness, has a legitimate right to exist and can excuse behaviour.
To Stephen, Emily became a treasurea priceless jewel. Most of Stephens faults were forgiven, reduced to annoying quirks. It wasnt perfect, but it went unnoticed.
Not every man knows how to compliment or court a woman, Emily admitted. So I wont berate him for not bringing flowers or opening doors. Ill just pull my own chair at the restaurant, so Im comfortable.
She applied the same logic elsewhere. She understood Stephens inability to tidyhis mother always did it. He couldnt cook; his mother taught him that too. He didnt know how to operate the washing machine. In short, he knew nothing of domestic chores, and Emily realised many men simply arent taught these things.
She still asked Stephen to help, taught him, but most of the time did it herself.
She also accepted his lack of overt fatherly affection toward their son, Denis, citing science: men generally bond with children between two and three years old; theyre clueless about a screaming infant and often scared.
That explained Stephens irritation when little Denis wailed, or when Emily spent more time with her son than with him. Fear, jealousyboth understandable.
When their marriage crossed the tenyear mark, Emily accepted Stephens growing coldness.
Old habits die hard. Were not lads with raging hormones any more, she mused.
She understood his need for outings with friendswork, home, a change of scenery.
A strange thought crossed her mind: what if Stephen ever strayed? Could she accept it? No answer was needed; Stephen never looked elsewhere, and there was no such flaw to tolerate.
Emilys life wasnt defined solely by her husband. Their son Denis followed his fathers footsteps, preferring videogame battles over chores, despite Emilys attempts to teach him household duties. The bond between father and son became their shared language.
Emily also had a younger brother, Colin, whose temperament was the oppositeloud, confrontational, thriving on drama. As a child, Emily had often wept from his antics, later realizing it was jealousy and his desire to control emotions. His marriage was brief; his wife, with a fiery character, fought him for years before they divorced, leaving their little daughter Zinnia without a full family.
Colin eventually became a Sundaydad, still clueless about domestic workanother Stephen in the family. Before taking Zinnia for the weekend, hed ask Emily to tidy his flat and cook something decent, because he was content ordering takeout.
Their mother, Margaret, was an unassuming pillar. When she asked for help, no child could refuse. Yet she never demanded too muchjust company, a chat while she cooked or cleaned. Emily obliged, understanding that her mothers needs were as much about companionship as assistance.
All this led to a decisive moment.
Im not ashamed of myself, Emily said, her voice steady. I was foolish to think I could swallow everyones flaws and keep the peace. I cared for you, thought youd care for menot because I did things for you, but because youd love, value, and respect me. I never felt that in all these years.
Silence fell. They were used to Emilys quiet. Now she spoke.
Yes, Im no longer a child, she continued. Its too late to rewrite everything, but Ill only do what I truly want from now on.
Ill feed you after work if I feel like it, set the table, wash the dishes. If I dont, Stephen, you know where the fridge is! She glared at her son. Youre seventeen nowlearn to cook, clean, iron a shirt if you want it pressed.
Turning to her brother, she said, If I want to visit my niece, Ill stop by and tidy up your place. If I dont, youll manage on your own or hire help. Dont expect me to do it.
And you, Mother, can welcome your daughter in a clean flat and serve something tasty yourself, instead of making me do everything!
Emily saw the sour faces around the table, understood they disliked what shed just said. She simply didnt want to be everyones convenience any longer. She wanted to be convenient for herself.
Im going home, Emily announced, rising. If you dont like the new rules, I wont call anyone, and you neednt call me!
Stephen and Denis returned only for their belongings. Colin stopped calling. Margaret called once, accusing Emily of selfishness.
Selfishness isnt just thinking of yourself, Emily replied. Its demanding everyone think of you first, then yourself. Ponder that.
Emily might not have intended such a drastic life overhaul, but life turned itself. A new chapter began for a new Emilya happy onebecause she finally said No.
