Everything in life happens for the first time at some point. Your first teacher, your first love, your first date, your first kiss. But Barbara would always remember her first prayer. That feeling stayed with her forevera sacred love for her grandmother Edith and her first words to God.
Barbara was retired, living alone now. Her daughter had long since married and moved to a nearby town with her own family. Barbara had spent her whole life in the villagemarried there, buried her husband there eight years ago. Sometimes, she went to church to light candles and say a prayer for her loved ones.
As she got ready for church, Barbara suddenly remembered her childhood and that very first prayer. She barely recalled her parentstheyd died in a motorbike accident on their way back from town when she was three. It was her grandmother Edith whod raised her.
One autumn, when the leaves had already turned gold and a fine drizzle hung in the air, Barbara fell ill.
«Mustve caught a chill somewhere,» her grandmother tutted. «I keep telling you to wear a hat. Your head got wet, the wind blew, and there you have it. Autumn for you.»
Edith didnt take her to the hospitalshe treated her the way she knew best. That first night, Barbara had a bit of a fever, drifting in and out of strange, fleeting dreams. She was eight then.
In the morning, Edith checked her temperature. «Thank the Lord, its gone down. Barbara, love, whats the matter? What would you like?»
«Just tea,» Barbara croaked, licking her dry lips before closing her eyes again.
«Right you are, my dear. Ill mash up some blackcurrant in a cup, add honeybest thing for an illness. Knocks it right out.»
Barbara knew this remedy well. Every winter she fell ill, this was the drink waiting for her. Shed sip the tea, then scrape up the bittersweet mush left at the bottom. She liked it. When Edith had a moment, shed sit by her granddaughters bed, knitting socks, humming songs, or telling stories from her own life. And every evening, without fail, shed praysometimes in the afternoon tooasking God to make Barbara well again.
One evening, watching her grandmother pray before the little icons in the corner, the flickering oil lamp casting soft light, Barbara felt a sudden jolt of fear.
«What if my grandmother dies? Id be all alone.» The thought had never struck her before, and now it terrified her.
She pictured Edith lying in a coffin, just like Mrs. Clarke from next door had last autumn. Shed gone with her grandmother to «say goodbye to Gladys,» as Edith put it. Barbara had been friends with Gladyss grandson, Samthey even walked to school together. But now the idea of being alone made her cry. Just then, Edith came over.
«Whats wrong, love? Why the tears?» she asked softly, stroking Barbaras hair.
«Granny you wont die, will you?»
Edith hesitated. «Me? Well, one day I will. Everyone does. Thats just the way of things.»
«But not soon?»
«When the good Lord decides. Why the sudden worry?»
«I dunno Why do people have to die?»
«Good heavenswhat else would they do? Everyone goes to meet their Maker in the end. Thats how its meant to be.»
«But why?»
«Thats not for us to know, sweetheart,» Edith said after a pause. «And we dont need to. Just live rightly, by Gods commandments, and thats that. When the time comes, you go as you should.»
«So God decides how long we live?» Barbara asked, surprised.
«Of course He does.»
«Could He make someone live a very long time?»
«He could. He can do anything,» Edith replied, crossing herself before leaving the room.
An idea struck Barbara.
«I wonder what Granny prays for. What does she ask God? Probably to live a long life. That must be it. So I should ask God for that too. Ill ask Him to let Granny live a very, very long time. I dont want to be alone. She always says childrens prayers reach Heaven faster. But how do I do it so no one sees or hearsexcept God, of course?»
The next day, Edith went to church.
Barbara thought hard and came up with a plan. Shed pray when her grandmother was outmaybe at the shops or visiting a neighbour. The perfect chance came the very next morning when Edith left for church.
«Barbara, I wont be long. Youll be alright on your own, or I could send Sam over so youre not bored.»
«No, Granny, Ill be fine. Samll come by later anyway.»
«Suit yourself. Ive got to go to church and say my prayers.»
Barbara watched from the window as her grandmother turned the corner toward the church. She drew the curtains tightno one was going to see her praying.
On the little shelf where Edith kept her icons, Barbara recognised Saint Nicholas and the Virgin MaryEdith had told her about them. She stood before them, unsure which to address. The house was perfectly still. She settled on Saint Nicholas.
«I dont know any prayers,» she realised.
The saints painted eyes seemed to watch her, making her fidget.
«Right, Im meant to ask for Granny to live a long time, but how do I start? How do you even talk to a saint?»
She stared at the icons, then an idea came.
«If I just ask for Granny, theyll hear me in Heaven anyway. They know Im little and dont know prayers yet. But Ill ask Granny latershell teach me one and tell me how to do it properly.»
She looked at Saint Nicholas and whispered,
«Please, make my Granny Edith never die Wait, no, not like that. I mean, make her live a long, long time. Her legs and heart hurtwhat if she goes soon? Shes old, and Im scared to be alone. Give her good health I love her so much, so please help me. Let her live a long life. Shes kind and always prays to Youshes gone to church again today.»
She rambled on, saying whatever came to mind. Her chest tightened with hope that Saint Nicholas would help. Then she lay down to wait for Edith.
Eventually, the door creaked open. Edith came in, handing her a bar of chocolate.
«Howre you feeling, love?»
«Alright, Granny. Can I askhow do you pray to Saint Nicholas?»
«Same as any saint Why the sudden interest?»
«Is there a special prayer?»
«Oh yes, several,» Edith said, eyeing her curiously. «Ill show you one tonight.»
«Okay, Granny.»
Edith went to the kitchen to light the stove, thoughtful.
«Whats got into Barbara? Asking about prayers Strange. But then again, its only right. I ought to teach her at least one.»
That evening, as Edith prayed before bed, Barbara watched, mouthing some of the words. When her grandmother sat by her bedside, she asked,
«Granny, if you ask Saint Nicholas for something, does he tell God?»
Edith smiled, stroking her hair. «More or less. He prays to God for us. So we stay well and healthy.»
Barbara fell asleep straight awaya deep, peaceful sleep. Just before drifting off, she thought:
«So I asked right. For Granny to be healthy and live a long, long time. That means itll happen.»
She slept soundly till morning. Even dreamed of a tall old man with a long white beard, a cross on his chest, and an open book in his hand. He smiled at herwarm and kind.
When she woke, she felt completely well. Light. Calm. She thought again:
«So they heard me in Heaven. Granny will live a very long time.»
Just then, Edith came in, smiling at her.
«How are you, love?» She pressed a hand to Barbaras forehead. «No fever, but lets check to be sure,» she said, handing her the thermometer.
«Granny, Im finereally. Just like when Im not ill at all.»
«Well, good. I saw Sam running to school earlierasked after you. I was by the gate. Said hed pop round after lessons. Best get your homework done. Its Fridayweekendll fly by, and then back to school.»
«Yeah, Granny. I want to go back,» Barbara beamed, handing over the thermometernormal, of course.
Edith lived to eighty-eight. By then, Barbara had married, had her daughter, and was caring for her grandmother when she fell gravely ill. Barbara tended to her with love, but the day Edith had spoken of long ago camequietly, in the night.
Barbara didnt go to church often, but today she wouldto remember her parents and her dear grandmother. Because today was Ediths birthday. Shed carried that date in her heart all her life, just as shed carried her love for her.
