**Diary Entry 30th November**
*What the hell are you doing home so early?* My husband, James, appeared in the bedroom doorway, looking startled.
*Who was calling? Its nearly midnight,* he asked, eyebrows raised.
*Oh It was my boss,* I mumbled, avoiding his gaze. *Theres an urgent work conference I have to attend.*
*At midnight? Really? And what conference is this? Are you sure its necessary?*
*Yes, unfortunately. Its one of the biggest events in the industrytop experts, groundbreaking developments. I cant miss it.*
*But you just flew to Manchester for that exhibition last month. Theres really no one else they can send?*
*I dont want to go either, James, but you know how important this is for my career. Its only two weeks. You understand, dont you?*
*Fine, if its that important* He frowned. *I just hate being left alone. Ill miss you like hell.*
*Me too, love. But the sooner I go, the sooner Ill be back. After this, well book a holidayjust the two of us!* I pressed myself against him.
*Alright, Ill survive the fortnight.*
Two days later, James helped me load my suitcase into the taxi.
*Right, Im off! Love youdont miss me too much!*
As the car pulled away, I opened my phone and tapped out a message to a familiar number.
*Left the house. Be at the airport soon.*
*Perfect. Im waiting in our room. Cant wait to see youmissed you!* came the reply, punctuated with suggestive emojis.
A sly smile crept onto my lips as I glanced at my wedding ring. Another lie to my devoted husband. But I didnt regret it. James was a good man, just dull. Unlike Daniel. Just thinking of him made my stomach flutter.
Two weeks of scorching sun, turquoise waves, and intoxicating nightsthats what I craved. The conference? A convenient excuse. I knew exactly how wrong this was. But logic was useless against the temptation ahead.
The island was paradise. I lounged on the beach, mesmerised by the glittering sea, blissfully lost in Daniels company.
I watched him emerge from the water, muscles glistening under the sun. His damp skin sent shivers through me. I wanted to drag him back to our room, where wed spend hours tangled together.
A pang of sadness hit methese were our last days. Id told James I was at a work conference, sneaking in a break. A break from *him*, if I was honest.
I wasnt ready to divorce himnot until I had a secure landing spot.
*Daniel, do you think we can make this work after I leave James?*
He sprawled on the sunbed, towel slung over his shoulders, and traced a finger along my knee.
*Itll be fine. Just get everything sorted firstmaybe hire a solicitor. Better than hoping for the best on your own.*
His doubt stung. Id imagined moving in with him straight after the divorce, weeks of uninterrupted passion.
That evening, we dined at a seafront restaurant, toasting our final night. Wine warmed my veins, but my thoughts kept drifting to Jamesand the storm waiting at home.
In my eyes, James was a naïve fool, blind to my infidelity. But divorce? That could be messy. If his mother got involved, the legal battle would drag on.
*Soon, Ill be divorced, living with youfinally happy,* I declared, raising my glass.
*Whoa, no. That was never part of the deal.*
I froze. He was rightwed never discussed it. Ice flooded my veins.
*Look, this was fun, but Im not leaving my family. Ive got a wife, two kidsdidnt I mention that?*
I shook my head slowly, heart hammering.
*You want to leave your husband? Fine. But Im not blowing up my life for you. My wifes pregnant with our third. Time to be a proper family man.*
*Right,* I muttered, seething.
But he *was* right. Hed promised me nothing. All those fantasies were my own doing.
The flight home was silent, my chest aching. I hadnt felt betrayal this sharp in years.
*Youre really not leaving her?*
*Emily, no sane man leaves his wife for his mistress. If youd cheat on him, youd cheat on me. My familys happyI dont need you permanently. Harsh, but thats life, sweetheart.*
He tucked a strand of hair behind my ear and kissed my forehead. Usually, that melted me. Now, I wanted to slap him.
As the plane landed, he said, *Alright, Em, Ill call you.*
*Dont bother.*
I hoped hed chase me. He didnt.
The taxis pulled away in opposite directions.
Tears choked me. That future Id dreamed of was ash. I had to go home, swallow my pride, and salvage my marriage. I couldnt bear being alone.
Id never lived alonealways jumping from one relationship to another. Being single? Unthinkable.
This trip was unforgettable. But it was time to face realityreturn to James, end the affairs. These men were fleeting distractions, offering no real future. Loneliness terrified me.
The car stopped outside my building. I dragged my suitcase inside, rehearsing what to say to James. Maybe counselling. Maybe a holiday together. Could I rekindle what wed lost?
I slid the key into the lock, turned it, and pushed the door open.
*What the hell are you doing home so early?* James appeared, wide-eyed.
I shoved past him and froze.
A womanhalf-dressedscrambled off *our* bed, clutching the duvet.
I shouldve screamed. Collapsed. Run. Instead, I lunged.
James barely pulled me back as I clawed at her. She fled, yanking her dress on, while I shrieked, *Im working my arse off, and you bring some slut home? I hate you both!*
Only when I sagged in his grip did he let go.
*I know you werent at a conference,* he said coldly. *You were with Daniel. While you were off shagging him by the sea, I planned a little surprise of my own.*
His words were a knife to my ribs. I searched his eyes for remorse. There was none.
Silently, I repacked my suitcase and walked out.
An hour later, I sobbed into my best friend Lilys lap, staining her pink dress. *Every couple hits rough patches,* she soothed. *Real love means forgiving.*
Forgive infidelity? Never. Id sworn that as a teenager. Yet here I was, considering it.
By morning, forgiveness didnt seem so impossible. Wed both been vile. Were we really the same people whod once been inseparable?
*Well?* Lily pressed.
*Ill see him tomorrow. Well talk.*
*Good. No use crying for months. Youve both had a wake-up call. Youll reconcilejust wait!*
I didnt believe her. If James had strayed, love was dead. But wed built a life together. Could we move past this?
The next day, I stood at his door, rehearsing my speech.
He let me in, wordlessly put the kettle on.
*Ive thought about it,* he said. *We should try again. We hurt each other, but weve got something worth saving.*
I stared.
He took my hands. *Lets forgive and forget, yeah? Start fresh. Maybe a baby. A bigger place. And no more lies.*
I collapsed against him, weeping.
Somehow, we grew stronger after the wreckage. We talked more. Planned. Neither of us dared look elsewhere again.
I dont know how long this will last. But for now, were fighting for it.
