Too Late
Laura stepped out of the consultants office at StThomas Hospital, her mind a whirlwind. She unfolded the clinic slip once more, eyes skimming the line in black ink: Gestation 78weeks. How could this happen? How did I not notice? she thought, sliding into the drivers seat of her silver Mini. Did I miss my pill? What nowshould I have a baby? Im fortythree already, and this?
The city lights blurred as she drove toward her flat in Camden, lost in a fog of questions. At a red light she didnt even realize the traffic had started moving until a harsh horn from the car behind jolted her awake.
Inside her upstairs flat she threw herself into chores, trying to drown the thudding of her thoughts. After lunch her sisterinlaw, Pippa, popped in for a quick visit.
Mum, Ive got a surprise for you! she chirped, taking a seat at the kitchen table.
Spill it, lovedont keep me waiting, Laura replied, curiosity bright in her eyes.
Pippa, Sam just proposed and I said yes! Pippa beamed, her smile widening.
Congratulations, darling! Laura said, tears welling as she wrapped her arms around her. The fiancé was a smart, driven, steady twentyfiveyearold named Samwelleducated, decent, and already earning a respectable salary, independent of his parents. He and Pippa had been together nearly three years, and in that time Laura had watched his commitment solidify.
So, whens the wedding? Laura asked, pouring hot tea into two mugs.
Not set yet, Pippa shrugged. We havent decided. Probably next summer.
Will you tell Dad? Laura pressed, eyes fixed on her daughter.
I dont know, Pippa frowned. Honestly, I dont even want to
Pippa, you cant do that, Laura snapped. Hes your father, he loves you. I know youre hurt, but people separateit doesnt mean you have to cut off contact. Ive forgiven him; you should too. Dont hold a grudge, and invite him to the wedding.
What? How can you be so? Pippa snapped, voice shaking. He left you for another woman, ran off with his secretary for a whole year! How could you possibly forgive that?
Love, we were together for twentytwo years, raised youwhat a bright, beautiful girl. Those were happy years, and Im grateful to Simon for them. But he fell in love with someone else. You cant command his heart Laura tried to explain. What did you expect me to do? Throw a tantrum, smash dishes? Nurse a grudge? Hate him till death? Because his feelings cooled? Its absurd, Pippa. Dont you see?
No, Mum, I dont get it, Pippa shook her head. If Sam did this to me, Id I dont even know what Id do!
Laura let the argument die; Pippas fiery temper would never understand. Youth sees things differently, she thought.
After seeing Pippa out, Laura returned to the kitchen, washed dishes, and pulled a slab of beef from the freezer for dinner. The news of her unexpected pregnancy gnawed at her. Giving birth at her age, and alone, terrified her, yet the longing to be a mother againcaring for a child, walking that hard yet joyous pathwas strong.
She opened a photo album from the loft, flipping through pictures of Pippa as a baby in a onesie, grinning at her grandmother, then older in a fancy dress by the city park gate. She recalled the day Pippa fell off a swing, the trip to the doctor, the sutured knee, the thin scar that still lingered. A school photo showed her in firstgrade, bouquet in hand, with Simon looking proud. Laura remembered her own youthful selfslim, in a light blazer, stilettos, a fringe that barely touched her eyebrowslaughing at the silly haircut she once wore.
Another picture captured Pippa in Year5, playing the Snow Queen at the Christmas concert, a silver dress Laura had sewn herself after weeks of rummaging through cheap fabric stores. The three of themLaura, Simon, and a grownup Pippastood on a sunny beach in Cornwall, bronzed and smiling.
A wave of melancholy washed over Laura. Once shed believed her family was the strongest, most united one around. She and Simon had shared dreams, built a home, bought a car, travelled. Laura had finally opened her own bridalgown atelier, a dream realised. Yet she had never again carried a child to term. The first pregnancy ended in miscarriage; the second made it to fourteen weeks before a scan revealed severe fetal abnormalities, forcing a heartbreaking termination. Shed spent a night sobbing in a hospital ward, then decided she would never try again.
Looking back, irony struckonce shed had youth, a loving husband, prosperity, and a burning desire for another baby, now fate tossed her an unexpected pregnancy as a cruel joke.
Simons departure hadnt shocked her; shed long suspected his affair. He denied it, accusing her of wild imagination. Laura had launched a desperate campaign to win him backcounselling, seductive dances, even a homemade stripteasenothing worked. A month earlier Simon packed his bags, filed for divorce, and left. Their final, bitter conversation lingered for weeks. She never understood what he had found in that office flirtOlivia, a young secretary with silicone lips, long false lashes, a plunging neckline that made Lauras skin crawl. Shed begged Simon to replace her, but he shrugged, Lara, I dont care what she looks like. Shes efficient, clever. I cant waste time hiring someone new; the firms a mess already. Laura sensed Olivia was more a personal indulgence than a professional asset, and later discovered her suspicions were right.
The betrayal cut deep: Simon swapped a twentyyear partnership for a plasticsurgery doll, shattering everything theyd built. Yet life moved on. He left Laura the twobedroom council flat she still occupied, moving with Olivia to a country house. The thought of a stranger now living where theyd once raised a child haunted Laura, even though she had agreed to stay in the city for work and because Pippa and Sam lived nearby.
The next day, a Saturday, Laura visited her old friend Ellen, whom shed known since the childrens nursery. Ellen welcomed her with a bottle of whisky.
Lets have a proper tipple, Larafifty grams each. Ive cooked a roast, perfect with a splash, Ellen winked, pulling out glasses.
Thanks, Ellen, but I cant. Im not supposed to, Laura said.
What? Pills? Ellen asked, puzzled. You pregnant?
Yes, Laura replied with a small smile, then sat down, stunned by the revelation. Ellen burst out laughing. You and Simon split, right? Or have you already taken a lover?
No, love, this child is Simons. We had one nightcandles, wine, lace It was a mistake, but now Laura gestured to her belly.
Good grief, Lara! What will you do? Ellen asked, shaking her head.
Im not sure, Laura sighed. I only found out yesterday. I dont know what to think.
Ellen warned, Youre pushing fifty; having a baby now is risky. Youll need support, maybe child maintenance. Pippa might get married soon, grandchildren on the way Dont gamble, love. Laura nodded, halfagreeing, halfdoubting herself.
She left Ellen and drove to Pippas flat.
Mum, hey! Pippa greeted, bright. Want a coffee?
No, love, not today. I need to talk. Is Sam home? Laura asked, hoping for a private chat.
No, hes at his parents fixing the roof, Pippa replied.
Laura told her about the pregnancy.
Do you actually want this child? Pippa asked.
Yes, Laura whispered, but Im scared
What did the doctor say?
Everything looks fine, the babys developing normally. I lost two children before, never knowing why. Doctors werent great Im terrified to go through that again. At my age, they say its dangerous, and the baby could have problems. Ive read horror stories online. She paused, breath trembling. I dont know if Im ready.
Listen, Mum, Pippa urged, you need thorough checkups. Health comes first. Modern medicine has advanced; many women have healthy babies after forty. If youre fit, why not?
Laura nodded. Maybe youre right. Ill think about it
She saw a doctor, found no serious health risks, and chose to keep the baby. Should I tell Simon? she mused, Hes gone, Im useless to him, the child useless to him too. Shed only met him a couple of times since the split, when he collected a few boxes from the flat. Six months later he turned up at her boutique unexpectedly.
Lara, Im here because I need the house papers. I called, you didnt answer. Did you change the locks? Simon asked, eyeing her rounded belly.
I did, Laura said calmly. And you thought you could stroll into my place whenever you liked? Weve settled that. I have no documents.
Simon smirked, So youve got time for a new husband?
No, Simon, Im not getting married. My life isnt your concern. I have work, Im busy.
He left, muttering something about the babys due date, wondering how long shed be pregnant. Later, Olivia strutted into his office, Hun, Im starvinglets go eat. He brushed her off, Go alone if you must. She left sulking.
Weeks later, Lauras son was born in the maternity ward, welcomed by Pippa, Sam, Ellen, and a few of Lauras seamstresses. Sam cradled the tiny bundle in a blue swaddle.
Lord, hes so small! he whispered, shaking gently.
Hes gorgeous, isnt he? He looks just like you, Mum, Pippa cooed.
Exactly like you, Laura laughed, tears spilling.
Back at home, Laura gasped at the transformation: Pippa and Sam had turned a spare room into a nursery, hanging multicoloured garlands, balloons, and a large banner above the cot reading Happy Birthday, Dylan! (the name Laura had chosen). The boy was healthy, and Laura felt a warmth she hadnt known in years. Days slipped by filled with infant care. Pippa often visited, looking after Dylan or taking him to the nearby park, giving Laura a breather.
See, love? Youve already got a taste of motherhood, Laura teased, watching Pippa juggle the baby. When its your turn, youll be ready.
I love it! Pippa replied, eyes sparkling at Sam.
Months later, a knock echoed at the flats door. Simon stood there, a bouquet in hand.
Hello, Laura, he said, extending the flowers, which she refused.
Simon, what brings you here? she asked, arms crossed, voice icy.
I knowDylan is my son. Nicky, your friend, mentioned it, he said.
Even if thats true, does it matter now? Laura replied.
Please, Lara, I was a fool. I see the mistake I made. I want to be part of our sons life. Will you let me? Simon pleaded, eyes searching.
Laura stared at him, remembering a year ago she would have given anything for those words. Now she thought of the old saying, He who once betrayed, will betray again.
No, Simon. Its too late. Dont come back, she said, stepping back and slamming the door, locking it.
Let me see my son! he shouted, pounding.
He returned a few more times, each time Laura barred him. He began tailing her in the park with the stroller, begging forgiveness, pleading for a family again. Yet she stood firm. At Pippa and Sams wedding, Simon turned up briefly, handed a generous cheque, and fled. Later Laura learned he had married Olivia, only for the marriage to dissolve within months when she left him for another man.
The story settled, the harsh winter of betrayal giving way to a fragile spring of new life, and Laura, though bruised, walked forward with Dylans tiny hand gripping her own.
