Emma and I have been mates since schoolwell, since Year 7, when she moved into our neighbourhood. Back then, I didnt have any close girlfriends. Most of the girls flocked around the schools golden girl, Lucy Hartwell, whose dad was some fancy professor. The rest of us, me included, just did our own thing.
I never bowed down to Lucy, but I didnt pick fights eitherjust stayed neutral. While her crew sized up the new girl, checking out her family background, I took Emma under my wing. Naturally, I filled her in on Lucy and her little entourage.
*»Why are you always on your own? Rebelling or something?»* Emma asked me once.
*»Nah, just like my own company. Suits me fine. But if youd rather hang with them, I wont hold it against you.»*
She chose me. We werent bulliedjust ignored. I showed her around school, warned her about the teachers, and basically gave her the lowdown on our class dynamics. Funny thingLucy, the professors daughter, never followed in her dads footsteps. Last I heard, she was working in some boutique. She pretended not to recognise me when I saw her.
Emma was cleverer than me, prettier tooor at least thats how I saw it. Teenage years, eh? Always hating how you look. I thought I was too plump, my chest too big, my legs too short. My hair was a frizzy messproper ugly duckling. Emma, though? Smooth blonde hair, bright blue eyes, *just* the right curves, and legs for days.
Years later, she admitted shed actually thought *I* was the pretty one and had been secretly jealous.
We became inseparable. Even planned to go to the same uniuntil her mum pushed her towards an economics degree, while I was dead set on medicine. Not just any doctorI wanted to be a surgeon.
We argued, didnt speak for three days, then made up because we were rubbish without each other. In the end, we both went our own ways. Saw less of each other, but when we did meet up, wed talk for hours.
Second year, Emma fell hard for some bloke on her course. Went on about him non-stopdrove me mad. Meanwhile, I was drowning in Latin and anatomy, no time for romance.
Third year, she had an abortion. Her parents never knew. Fourth year? Pregnant again. I couldnt stand the guy. Tried talking her out of keeping it, out of marrying himbut she wouldnt listen. Told her parents, and they made *damn* sure she wasnt left a single mum.
By sixth year, Id ditched surgery for gastroenterologyless stress. Didnt see Emma for two years, then bumped into her randomly. Shed put on weight, looked rounderI wondered if she was pregnant again but didnt ask. She was pushing a pram with this adorable little girl, all dressed in pink. Emma caught me eyeing her belly and laughed. *»Yeah, another one on the way. Husband wants a boy.»*
She was shocked I was still single. Thats when she admitted shed envied me at school, thought *she* was the plain onepanicked no one would want her. *»Bloody ridiculous,»* I said. We parted with promises to stay in touch.
A year after the son was born, her husband left. *»Called me fat. A cow. Said I trapped him with kids. That hes *repulsed* by me.»* She sobbed down the phone.
*»Why didnt you say something? Id have helped you lose the weight,»* I scolded.
She looked roughsweats, hair in a scrappy ponytail, those blue eyes dull. Told her gentlydivorce or not, she couldnt let herself go.
*»Well *youre* still fit, and lookstill alone,»* she shot back. I let it slide.
Her kids grew upNick started school, Lily got all boy-crazy. I had flings here and there, never stuck. Wasnt fussedjust how it was. We saw each other, but life got in the way.
Then I got sent to a three-day conference in London.
Spot this blokestaying next door at the hotel. One of those *know* it when you see it moments. Ended up sharing a table at dinner. When he heard where I was from, he mentioned a new clinic opening therehis mate running it, asking if hed join.
*»Heard about that place. Good reputation,»* I said.
*»Think I should take the job?»* he asked.
*»Your call.»*
Last night, there was a concert and buffet. We talked, drank wine. I kept checking the timehad a late train home. Just as I went to say goodbye, someone pulled him away. No time to wait, so I left.
Thought he liked me too, but he never asked for my number. Maybe assumed wed bump into each other. Maybe had a wife. No ring doesnt mean anything. Stillbloke should make the first move, right?
*»Bet hell be surprised when Im not at breakfast,»* I thought smugly. *»Shame, though.»* Sighed and forced myself to forget it. Not meant to be.
Two months later, Emma calls, giddy, inviting me over.
*»Whats happened? You sound *buzzing*,»* I said.
*»Come find out,»* she teased.
Brought sweets and ice cream for the kids, a bottle of white for us. Emma was *glowing*hair cut, even lost weight.
*»Youve met someone,»* I guessed.
*»Oh my *God*, hes *perfect*,»* she gushed, describing himand all I could picture was *him*.
*»Youd *love* him. Total dream.»*
Shed sent Nick to his grans, Lily was out with friends. Made me feel ancient*should* I have had kids by now? We drank, ate ice cream.
*»Hes new at this clinic»* she rambled.
*»WaitI thought you worked at the bank?»*
*»Oh! I quit ages ago. Better pay at the clinic. AnywayIm leaving the office with my laptop, and *he* offers me a lift. Carries my bag upstairs, I offer tea»*
*»And?»*
*»Nothing *yet*. But its coming.»*
*»So youre not actually together?»* I tried not to sound relieved. *»Whats his name?»* (Already knew.)
*»James. James Oliver Whitmore.»*
Felt like Id been doused in cold water. Dont believe in coincidenceswhat kind of cruel joke was this? Emma kept gushing*so* kind, *so* attentive, shed invite him to her birthday, and then
*»And hes *single*? Weird for a bloke like that. Red flag, maybe?»* I prodded.
She shrugged. *»Youre just jealous. WatchIll marry him.»*
«Devastated» didnt cover it. But maybejust *maybe*it was a different James. Told her I was happy for her, made excuses, left.
Two weeks laterher birthday party. And *there he was*. James recognised me instantly, rushed over. Emma glared.
Hed taken the job at the clinic. *»You should work with us! Heard theres an openingthought of you straight away.»*
*»Ill think about it,»* I muttered.
Emma dragged him off to help in the kitchen. I slipped out. Not about to scrap over a bloke with my best mate, was I?
*»Finally meet a man Id actually marry, and *she* wants him?»* Ranted the whole walk home. *»Whys he so *wishy-washy*? Shouldve asked for my number in *London*.»*
Then*»Wait!»* Hed followed me.
*»Whyd you leave?»*
*»You *know* were best friends, right? And shes *mad* about you.»*
*»Theres *nothing* there. Gave her a lift onceshes built it up. But Im *glad* I came tonight. Moved here because of *you*.»*
Walked me home. *Still* didnt ask for my number. Got back to ten missed calls from Emma. Rang hershe *screamed* down the phone: *»Some *friend*! Snatching him right»*
*»Emma, I *met* him at that conference! He recognised mehas no mates here»*
We rowed like schoolgirls over some boy.
*»Just *let me* have him,»* she begged suddenly. *»Youre gorgeousyoull find someone. This might be my last chance.»*
*»Em you *sure* he even *wants* you? He *followed *me*.»*
*»Not your problem. Just *back off*. Theres nothing between you, right?»*
*»No.»*
Truth was, I barely knew James. Plenty of fish in the sea. The whole mess felt grubby. Decided if I saw him again, Id talk properly.
Two days laterhe turns up at my surgery with flowers. I told him about Emma.
*»This is *awkward*, Emma. Dont know what to do,»* he sighed.
*»Shes my *best friend*. I wont fall out over you. Sorry, Jameswe cant.»*
A week passes. Emma shows up at minebraced for another row. But she just said:
*»We talked. He likes *you*. I wanted to hurt you at first. Then realisedwhats the point? Cant force it. Sorry, Em. Wont get in your way. And *dont* you dare turn him down for me.»*
Hugged, cried, got pissedleft as friends.
James and I started dating. Two months laterhe proposed. Emma came to the wedding with a *date*.
Got pregnant straight awaywhy wait? Rang Emma constantly for advice. She calmed my nerves.
Still best mates. Not rivals. Not enemies. We *both* got our happy endings. Couldve torn each other apartbut they say female friendship only lasts until a man comes along. Ours? Survived it.
