The Third Wheel
Emily, love, why do we need a baby? his wife would say, Were perfectly happy as two! Darling, kids bring a heap of hassle: they wont let you get a decent nights sleep, you need roundtheclock care. Ill ruin my figure and end up plump Do we really want that? Lets push the idea of a child back a good six years, shall we?
***
Evan and Emily had been married for five years, and at first everything felt like a fairytale. Then Evan gently nudged the subject of motherhood, while Emily, as best she could, kept postponing it, until one day she flatout declared she didnt even want to hear the word children. Their relationship began to fray, arguments flared, and Evan slipped into shameful blackmail. All Emily could muster these past months was:
Evan, whats the point of a bundle of drool and sniffles? Sleepless nights, openended nappy changes, a figure that looks like a cow after calving, and constant fatigue. And thats just the milder side of it! I dont want to bury my youth for that. Lets wait a bit longer!
To Evan, his wifes words sounded like thunder on a clear day. Before they wed, Emily had dreamed of a big family and reassured him:
Of course, love, well have loads of kids! At least three! But not straight away, okay? Lets have a few years to ourselves, get settled, then well start the nursery.
Five years after the wedding, Emily suddenly announced she was not ready for children. Evan, who had always longed for an heir, tried to convince her that the time was long overdue:
Emily, weve been together eight years, five of those married. I think its high time we think about the next generation! Weve got a flat, a car, a decent nestegg saved for paternity leave and a baby. What are we waiting for?
What makes you think now is the right moment? Emily huffed. I reckon we still need a bit of us time. I have a mountain of plans, a bucket list I want to tick off! A baby just doesnt fit. Arent we fine just the two of us? We have everything! Why a third party?
What do you mean third party? Are you talking about the baby as a stranger? Evan snapped. When will you ever be ready? In a proper family, children are a must. I want to be a dad, period! I dont get why youve flipped your stance so suddenly. Before we married you said the opposite!
Because its easy for you to lecture! Emily exploded. You dont have nine months of a growing belly, you dont endure morning sickness, you dont battle the extra weight! Ive been at the gym for five years! And now you think its all for nothing? Im not keen to lose my shape, nor give up my lifestyle! After a baby Id lose five years of friends, nights out, the whole normal life! Why would I want that?
Emily, thats how everyone lives! Evan tried to reason. Its no big deal, the child will grow, and youll get back to your hobbies. Ill help every step of the way!
Evan, lets revisit this in five or six years, okay? Im not ready now. I dont want us to argue, just accept my point of view. In the end, its my body and I get to decide what to do with it. I certainly dont want to ruin it!
At first Evan tried every trick in the book. They watched films about pictureperfect baby lives, strolled through parks and by playgrounds, and he even tried to get Emily involved with a newborn nieces fourth child, ferrying her over for visits. Emily never showed any enthusiasm; she seemed uncomfortable even touching the infant. Her maternal instinct was, to put it bluntly, missing.
***
Having exhausted every avenue, Evan set a final ultimatum:
Emily, if you dont want children with me, were not meant for each other. Lets split. Youll find someone who shares your views, and I I wont end up alone.
Emily gasped; divorce had never crossed her mind. She worked from home, and Evan helped her keep the household running. A split would mean hunting for a new job and a new flat.
Evan, wait! she pleaded. What are you talking about? Divorce? Would you really throw away what we have over this?
Its not a joke! Evan replied. I grew up in a full family with brothers and sisters. I believe a childfree marriage is doomed. Were wasting time. If you dont want kids, why stay together? I asked about children before we married and you always said yes! Now its all about not wanting to get fat. Its absurd!
Evan, why cant we just live for ourselves? A child is a huge expense. Wed have to give up a lot. Youd be fine, but Id have to overhaul my whole life! With a baby youre stuck at home, on call 24/7, sleepless, exhausted. Im not ready for that. Is that so hard to understand?
Ill hire a nanny! A housekeeper! Our parents will pitch in! Whats the problem? Evan shouted. The problem is your attitude toward the child! There isnt a speck of tenderness in your eyes! Emily, what do you actually want? How do you picture our future?
Emily couldnt admit she had no plans for children. She wanted to travel, buy pricey things, and needed a husband who would foot the bill. Though she still cared for Evan, finances were high on her list.
She found no support. Her aunt swooped in:
Emily, youre behaving disgracefully! Youve lost all sense of propriety! Forget youre married! Youre hopping from bar to bar while your husband works! Stop bringing shame on the family!
What am I doing wrong? Evan knows where Im going. Not every day, mind you! Weekends are at home, locked in! Give me advice, not condemnation. We argue constantly about kids. He wants them, I dont. Why now? Maybe you could talk to him? He respects you!
I wont talk to him! the aunt snapped. Hes right. Its about time you had a child, then youll finally get your wits about you!
Emily refused to budge. After all, it was her body. To distract Evan, she pretended to agree with his terms. One day she theatrically tossed a packet and declared:
Fine, Evan, Ill have a baby for you! But only if a nanny raises it and I can go on with my life!
Evan swallowed the claim. Yet Emily kept secretly taking contraceptive pills and, to keep Evan off guard, she took him to a familiar doctor who waved his hands and said:
Nothing to worry about. Just relax! Forget about the baby for now! Ive seen many couples who, after years of infertility, just let things happen naturally and it works!
***
Six months later the dreaded surprise struck: the pregnancy test showed two lines. Emily froze. What now? Abort the life shed built for years?
Evan popped into the bathroom unexpectedly. Emily tried to hide the test behind her back, but it was too late.
Whats that youve got there? Evan asked, leaning in.
Emily lowered her head. Evan snatched the test from her hand.
Emily! Are you pregnant? Oh my God, Im going to be a dad! He lifted her into his arms, spinning her around the bathroom, Thank you, love! This is the happiest day of my life!
Emily forced a smile. What now? How to navigate this twist?
They celebrated at a restaurant. A new ring glinted on Emilys finger, Evan sat opposite in a crisp suit, beaming, repeating:
Well be the best parents ever! I promise youll never lack anything! Thank you, darling!
That night Emily lay awake. Evans happy face kept replaying in her mind, and dark thoughts crept in:
Maybe a child will actually improve our life? Maybe Im just scared of change? I could lose weight, stay fit women manage it all. And its my partners child, after all
For the first time in years, Emilys heart fluttered. Something new and unfamiliar awakened within her. Perhaps shed made the right choice?
***
Nine months flew by. Evan doted on Emily, catering to her whims, picking the hospital, attending parenttobe classes together. Emily leaned on him, but the dread of labour and motherhood never left her.
When the due date arrived, Emily gave birth to a healthy boy. When the midwife placed him on her chest, she saw his tiny, wrinkled face, a spittingimage of Evan, letting out a funny little squeak. In that instant all her fears melted away.
My, Emily whispered, tears streaming down her cheeks.
They named him Sam. From day one, Emily dissolved into motherhood. She fed him, sang lullabies, took him for walks in the park. She even grew jealous when Evan held Sam. Each evening, sitting beside his crib, she asked herself the same question: how could I have been so foolish? Had she known earlier how much joy parenthood would bring, shed have jumped at it.
